Volume III: Mutuality
Weaving a community of care and belonging so that we can be generous together
Ethnic and economic division has torn the fabric of society, including relationships between leaders of funding orgs and Black nonprofit leaders. Weaving connection is our approach to solving this problem because solutions are the fruit of connection. At THE LOOM, we tell the stories of how these relationships are being woven and mended through trust, honor, mutuality, and co-creation.
Mutuality (n)-two or more people or groups feeling the same emotion, or doing the same thing to or for each other; the state of having reciprocity, mutual dependence
Synonyms-reciprocity, interdependency, correlation, alternation, mutualness, interdependence, mutual understanding, exchange, transaction, collegiality and mutual.
"I am both a giver and receiver in the tapestry of what God is weaving together with these relationships."
-Joey Sager
Featured Article
A Tribute to Ilinda Jackson
"…when mutuality is high, people tend to think of their partners’ characteristics and resources as their own.”
-APA Dictionary of Psychology
Mutuality can be a complex dance
Giving and receiving is rarely without tension, but this tension is also part of what can give a tapestry its form. It’s easier on our nerves to simply relax into homogeny...to isolate. Difference rubs. It’s uncomfortable. Woven threads take turns, and like those threads, we must respect and make room for differing perspectives based on divergent experiences.
This has the potential to send us in different directions, but when we do the hard work of finding common ground, making space for one another, listening to one another, and sharing leadership, a community of care and belonging can be woven though the threads of tension. “Us vs. them” gives way to us walking toward a flourishing future…together.
“Mutuality must be the cornerstone of the quest to make society more civil.”
-Professor Parvez Ahmed
Clarence Hill discusses 8 o’clock on the Dream Clock
“Which Golden Rule do you live by?”
-Clarence Hill
“I’ve had some awful experiences with a donor using their resources as a source of control in their attempts to silence my concerns about issues facing Black Americans.”
-Ron
Better Practices in Mutuality
Connect in one another’s spaces
Create opportunities for mutual feedback and evaluation
Include community input when setting funding priorities
Recognize and equalize power dynamics and the status quo that values power, wealth, and influence over wisdom, experience, and community trust
Compensate those with lived experience and community trust for their input
Be transparent about funding priorities and processes
Recognize that community transformation is a long game that requires sustained focus, partnership, and support
Fund leaders and nonprofit leaders must advise one another on where control must be ceded in order to accomplish shared goals
Threads
Threads are the resources that informed our weaving.
The Golden Thread
Allēlōn means “one another” or “mutually” and is mentioned 76 times in the New Testament. It conveys mutuality of intention and practice. The idea being conveyed is that if there’s something that one party is doing to another, it is expected to be returning to them as well. Numerous examples of this can be found in biblical admonitions to:
Love one another
Pray for one another
Instruct one another
Greet one another
Welcome one another
Serve one another
Patiently bear with one another
Speak the truth to one another
Encourage one another
Do good to one another
Do not speak evil against one another
Be at peace with one another
It is expected that mutuality is built into authentic relationships. Care, accountability, generosity, and honesty should flow in all directions. There are no one way streets. When we get busy “one anothering” and practicing mutuality, there will be no lack.
'Our desire is not that others might be relieved while you are hard pressed, but that there might be equality. At the present time your plenty will supply what they need, so that in turn their plenty will supply what you need. The goal is equality, as it is written: “The one who gathered much did not have too much, and the one who gathered little did not have too little.” '
2 Corinthians 8:13-15 NIV
Volume III Gratitudes: Special thanks to those who made Volume III possible.
Share your thoughts or experiences.
We would love to hear your thoughts or experiences regarding race and funding. Feel free to share them in the form below…anonymously if you prefer. You are also part of the story that is unfolding.